The snow is melting and Detroiters are enjoying the warm weather that March has bestowed upon us. And all I can keep thinking is, ah, Construction Season is right around the corner. Yep, just as the trees start sprouting their blooms the concrete will also start flowering the orange construction barrels (Ampulla fabricatio barrelus).
Try not to think of construction season as the pain that it is. Instead, think of it as extreme driving. Don’t forget to avoid the potholes!
Now, as you know, my husband is not from around these parts. He is used to driving on the wrong side of the road and shifting with his left hand.
Driving in Detroit has some unique particularities that I had to explain to him.
The Michigan Left
In the Detroit metropolitan area you can’t just turn left whenever your heart desires. No, sometimes you must either turn right and then make a U-turn or you must go straight, past where you wanted to turn left, and then make a U-turn and then turn right.
A street sign on Telegraph Road that attempts to show how to make a Michigan Left.
Easy enough, right? If that confused you take a look at this animated explanation of the Michigan Left from MDOT.
The first Michigan Left was installed at 8 Mile and Livernois in Detroit in the 1960’s. More on Livernois later.
The Lay of the Land: Mile Roads
The mile roads run east and west and it’s a pretty simple system. Although, I’m still not sure that my husband understands. Apparently, when giving directions in the UK they don’t use north, south, east, and west. At least he still has "Little Miss Garmin" to help him out.
The first few months he was here I gave him directions to everywhere via 15 Mile Road (Maple Road). One day he declared, “all roads lead to Maple.” Um, no they don’t but thanks for playing.
The only time the mile roads can be confusing is when they change names as they cross city and county borders like 15 Mile & Maple as stated above. 6 Mile Road is also McNichols and 5 Mile is also Fenkell.
Eight Mile Road is always Eight Mile. It is also somewhat of tourist attraction to non-locals who only know of it because of the movie. Thanks, Eminem. So, a bit of a PSA to all the tourists: It’s just a road! Move on, there’s nothing to see here.
My "Big Beaver Road, Exit 69" t-shirt.16 Mile Road probably has the most names; Metro Parkway, 16 Mile Road, Big Beaver, and Quarton. Our exit off of I-75 is Exit 69, Big Beaver Road. It always gets a chuckle and I even bought the t-shirt.
How Do You Say That?
For those of you who are new to the area or are visiting, the easiest way to stand out as someone ‘not from around these parts’ is to mispronounce the following street and city names. The husband still giggles every time we pass Schoenherr, like he’s in on an inside secret.
- Grosse Pointe, the E’s are silent people!
- Schoenherr Road is pronounced SHAY-ner.
- Livernois is pronounced LIVER-noise. Yeah, we pronounce the S.
- Gratiot Avenue is pronounced GRASH-ut.
- Notice that the h is before the s in Lahser Road. It’s pronounced LAH-ser. If you say Lasher to me I’ll punch you. Seriously.
Now, as far as the driving goes you’re on your own. However, I will say that if you are going the “suggested” speed limit on the major freeways then you’re going to have some trouble.